The beautiful Scottish Highlands are under grave threat from thosands of new and terrible mega-pylons. Health and environment may be savaged. Please read this page and sign Pylon Pressure's e-petition.

Exclusive: Secret government plans to hydrogen bomb Loch Ness!

Exclusive: Viking long ship discovered beneath Loch Ness!

Loch Ness missing link How could an ancient plesiosaur migrate to Loch Ness after the ice age? We may finally have the answer.

Nessie wins the Giant Tomato Award

Watch out for the launch of our new Loch Ness research website in which we will definitively seek to prove that a plesiosaur lives in our midst and feeds on killer plankton. Over here at Loch Ness we've got worthless pseudo-academic papers coming out of our ears, so we thought, hey it's about time we published them. Loch Ness science - virtual facts & fun!!!

£1000 Prize!!! - Nessie Alive and Well - William Hill Awards 2002 - read all about it!

Visiting Loch Ness? Nessie on the Net only suggests the Original Loch Ness Exhibition in Drumnadrochit and the award winning Loch Ness Lodge Hotel (the food was great there when we last tried it - far better than a lot of other stuff around). It's on the Beauly road and it's the cheapest - and we think it's the most pro-Nessie show in town! We suggest you think about going there before you think about visiting anywhere else. It's easy to get there from Inverness...Just drive to Drumnadrochit, past the thing that looks like a worn-out, crash-landed UFO and on up the road sign-posted to Beauly. You can't miss it! It's the "Original Loch Ness Exhibition". Let's face it, if you go anywhere else you may just end up learning about a load of boring old plankton and mud and who wants that on holiday?
Unless otherwise stated, all material on this website is copyright of Mikko Takala (electronics and computing designer and "implementer" of the "Loch Ness 2000 Exhibition" in Drumnadrochit).

Our "Officially Original Loch Ness Tour Guide" is more than just a tour guide and is almost ready!

 

Web lochness.co.uk

quangobusters.co.uk ochaye.co.uk

Latest
[A renowned Loch Ness researcher answers your questions: Professor Kettle PHd MGhPPk]

[Loch Ness Personalities: short profiles of famous and infamous alike]

[Latest Cryogenic Theory from our self-acknowledged leading Loch Ness researcher]

[Has Scottish Natural Heritage gone daft? It seems it's got its eye on taking over the Loch Ness Monster. Read all about it. The people who actually believe they have the right to be in charge of Nessie Hunting! hah hah hah!]
[Previous: International hunt for Nessie warned: don't put nets into Loch Ness]

[South African to Run Scotland's Millennium Dome]

[Nessie's Officially Original Loch Ness Tour Guide] - by popular demand we give our view on what's worth a visit and what's not.
[Nessie2000 - GUST Team listens to Nessie!]
[Officially Original Loch Ness Info Point FAQs & research - today's Loch Ness]
[Quango tries to dump 60 cubic metres
of sewage per day into Loch Ness]

Fan Club News - Nessie Caviar?
[ A well known formally unqualified local naturalist and Nessie hunter and latter day monster myth debunker grows his own ugly wee beastie!

Awards & Press Coverage
[Morning Glory - Channel4]
[Awards]

Not qualified? Wannabee a Loch Ness "academic"?
Don't want to waste time studying for a graduate degree, let alone a full-blown post graduate degree or professorship? That's okay. If it all seems a bit cumbersome - then why not check out our totally free "diploma"?!
There are lots of unqualified "wannabe academics" hanging around Loch Ness so go on and treat yourself! You can join their mediocre ranks and try and feel like a real academic too by filling out our simple free "Fellowship" Diploma form! It's yours to keep, print and cherish! And, like so much "science" around Loch Ness, it's totally worthless!

Special
[A salutary reminder of what happens to people who stay "middle of the road"!]

Nessie - the Monster
[Is Nessie a sturgeon?]
[Or maybe a seal?]
[Win £1000 for your photo!]
[Photos of the monster]
[All about our monster]
[Archive of sightings]
[Recent sightings]

Video
[Loch Ness LiveCam!]
[Loch Ness Today]

Info - Scottish Highlands & Islands
[Picturesque village of Drumnadrochit]
[General Information]
[Highland photo gallery]
[Highland Games]
[A Traditional Burns Night]

Interactive
[Send a Loch Ness postcard]
[The Monster Mailing List]
[Sign our guestbook]

Campaigns
[SAVE Urquhart Castle!]
[Skye Bridge Anti-toll campaign]
[SAVE Inverness-Heathrow flights]

Links
[The Loch Ness Gift Shop]
[The Jaggy Thistle - Inverness in culture bid: the end of satire?]
[Virtually Drumnadrochit!]
[Official Loch Ness Fan Club]
[Subservient Chicken!]
[lots more links at OchAye!]

Recent NEWS stories [Loch Ness Monster March to stop the Pylon Monsters!]

Because we receive so many thousands & thousands of requests from prospective visitors for information about where to visit and what to see, we decided to produce this guide. Unlike many tour guides ours will be refreshingly frank and refreshingly honest! Nothing will sway our intrepid top secret inspectors...We'll be telling it like it is, the good and bad. We are very excited about our new guide and we hope you'll like it too...so watch this space!

Why not watch our award winning Loch Ness LiveCam! First & best!!!

Plus: Local exhibitions: Are they for real? Are you getting value for money? Let's see.

Visiting Loch Ness? There are two exhibitions, but don't get confused. - Nessie on the Net! only recommends
"The Original Loch Ness Monster Exhibition" (on the Beauly road) in Drumnadrochit. The Scotsman Newspaper didn't think much of the village's other exhibition, Loch Ness 2000. Read its stinging criticism here. Pity Adrian Shine, a formally unqualified pseudo-scientist was allowed to try and kill off Nessie's myth in such a public way. As we said, why not vote with your feet and just pass them by and visit The Original Loch Ness Exhibition instead?

www.lochness.co.uk

Intellectual Property Rights Assertion. Copyright Mikko Takala 1995/96/97/98/99/2000/2001/2002/2003/2004/2005. Please email violations to: the webmaster). All rights reserved.
No part of this website may be reproduced in any form without the
prior written consent of the author. We aren't interested in kickbacks or giving credit where it sure ain't due. We want visitors and tourists to get the facts. We try and give them the facts - a policy that seems to work - as most seem very happy to come and visit.