If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
Friday, July 25, 2008
(Palm Beach Post) Florida Family of four weighs 900 pounds, amusement park ride holds 700 pounds. Check the tag, do the math, show your work (10)
(News.com.au) News Qantas comes VERY close to farking up that perfect safety record. Damage limited to big hole in cargo hold and 350 people with soiled underwear they bought at K-Mart in Cincinnati (30)
(Fayetteville Observer) Hero First woman in U.S. Armed Forces history is confirmed by Senate to wear 4 stars. Hero tag shatters 232-year old brass ceiling, Boobies tag stays hidden under camouflage (24)
(WREG) Dumbass Man breaks into bar, tries to cook food, catches the bar on fire, dies......Darwinstocrats (34)
(Some Guy) Interesting Harper's New Monthly Magazine, April 18, 1874: "I venture the prediction that within one hundred years from this time Cincinnati will be the greatest city in America, and by the year 2000, the greatest city in the world" (45)
(SMH) Obvious Bear in Alaska bites woman's head then spits her out. Did she taste bad? I dunno. Alaska (70)
(JSOnline) Amusing It bothers some to see vultures perched outside their hospital windows. "I've had patients tell me, 'Doc, it's not very reassuring.' " (56)

Thursday, July 24, 2008
(Kansas City) Scary Air Force missile silo crews caught sleeping on the job, will be replaced by WOPR (117)
(First Coast News) Florida Three people injured in horse drawn carriage accident. This is not a repeat from 1512 (30)
(Some Guy) Photoshop Photoshop theme: Not-so X-treme activities in X-treme locations. LGT example (59)
(Local6) Amusing Remember when NC had to recall 100's of "WTF" plates? Well, Arkansas just upped the ante (235)
(Reason Magazine) Interesting The land devoted to opium poppies in Afghanistan, even at the current record level of production, totals just 637 square miles, less than a third the size of Rhode Island (104)
(Some Sweaty Guy) Stupid State of New Mexico is SHOCKED to find out that Scientology-based rehab program that incorporates sauna and massage into treatment is not effective (w/ bonus sweaty druggie pics) (74)
(Some Guy) Amusing Who said it? Batman or Bush? (link goes to video) (113)
(Sign On San Diego) Amusing News: Fishermen snared by floating tuna ranch pen. Fark: Ship towing the pen didn't notice the marooned boat sitting in the middle of it for over two hours (38)
(The Morning Call) Dumbass It apparently needs repeating: Do not tailgate on the highway if you are transporting $25,000 worth of smack (50)
(Scientific American) Interesting Evolution has ensured that humans respond to anecdote, instead of science. Which explains the success of chiropracty as well as those urban legends your secretary forwards you (398)
(NewsOK) Interesting Oklahoma taking nominations for state rock song. Have at it (232)
(Mercury News) Asinine How to piss off airport staff: Try to get a dwarf through checked baggage (70)
(Durant Democrat) Dumbass Oklahoma lawmaker brings loaded gun to Capitol. Again. Bonus: It's not her first time on Fark (100)
(Labspaces.net) Obvious Girls don't suck at math, they just dupe your dumb ass into doing their homework for them (165)
(Some Guy) Dumbass How many times do 7 and 9 go into 44? According to the police, 30 times (123)
(Federal Bureau of Investigation) Interesting The FBI debunks 10 myths about itself. J. Edgar Hoover's dressing habits fail to make the list, which shouldn't surprise us, as they only list myths (75)
(NPR) Interesting That baby photographed swimming naked for Nirvana's album cover is now 17, hates school, likes water polo, and is grappling with his public image. "Quite a few people in the world have seen my penis. So that's kinda cool." (186)
(MSNBC) Followup Obama addresses an estimated crowd of 200,000 people in Berlin, 185,000 of whom were just there for a concert by the Decemberists (ℵ1)
(AFP) Interesting Newseum celebrates 100 years of the FBI. Interactive exhibits include "Let's Wiretap Martin Luther King" and "J. Edgar Hoover's Fashion School" (22)
(Some Flyin' High Guy) Amusing What to do with that old junked 727 that your dad left you (83)
(Some Chick) Photoshop Photoshop this strange bird (61)
(ABC News) Sad Here is the church / here is the steeple / another crane falls / and crushes two people (109)
(Media Matters) Amusing Ben Stein on Obama's convention speech: "Seventy-five-thousand people at an outdoor sports palace, well, that's something the Fuehrer would have done" (22)
(Kansas City) Interesting A former consultant for Anheuser-Busch in St. Louis accused of stealing from the company. His punishment is expected to be watered down and tasteless (80)
(AZCentral) Amusing Looks like playing golf can add five years to your life. Duffing that tee off into the water will take 10 take years off your life, though (88)
(ABC Action News) Followup Upset that inflation is ruining his name brand, 50 Cent sues 79 Cent, 89 Cent and 99 Cent (216)
(London Times) Scary One doctor's story of her time in Darfur. Not safe for soul (¼)
(Some Guy) Amusing "Participants identified their personal portraits significantly quicker when their faces were computer enhanced to be 20 percent more attractive" (89)
(Houston Chronicle) Interesting If you're poor and on food stamps, you can go to the Houston Zoo for free. But officials ask that you please not steal any of the animals' food to take home (85)
(BBC) Cool British Best in Show Competition: Entrants bark, sit, stay, roll over and blast enemies with solar cannons (21)
(TampaBays10.com) Florida Man decides that since his wife can't walk around naked on his neighbor's porch, that he should spit on him every time he sees him. That is all (169)
(Sign On San Diego) Amusing School waits 46 years for a drink of water. Best prank ever (105)
(Seattle Times) Obvious New study finds that people have to get to work somehow, and if they get robbed along the way, that's a risk they're willing to take (52)
(AP) Cool Southwest Airlines once again fails to receive memo that airlines must lose money, suck (179)
(BBC) Obvious Soy may reduce sperm count, even in modest amounts. Or maybe men who choose soy products are kind of girly to begin with (130)
(Some Blogger) Followup Interview with National Enquirer editor about catching John Edwards in an affair. Note: They had seven reporters at the hotel and there were at least 10 witnesses to Edwards trying to hide (256)
(Daily Mail) Asinine Man fined £30 for smoking at work. In his own van. Which he uses as a self-employed painter. And he wasn't working at the time. Or even driving to a job (96)
(CBS Chicago) Strange Man says he tried to snag Drew Peterson by posing as a woman and leading him on by instant message (38)
(The Day) Amusing Real men of genius. Today we salute you, Mr. Midnight Firetruck Thieving Joyrider (17)
(Some Guy) Amusing Five-year old boy slips out of day care, heads over to Hooters (93)
(The New York Times) Interesting Bill Gates and Mayor Michael R. Bloomberg announced on Wednesday that they would spend $500 million to stop people around the world from smoking. DUHHH smokes don't have software (83)
(Slate) Interesting If you've ever thought "Hey, I could really use a chart to keep track of who in the Bush Administration could face criminal charges, and for what", you're in luck (162)
(dequalss.com) Stupid 22% of Americans say states should have the right to secede (433)
(adn) Interesting Global warming strikes again as Anchorage, Alaska has coldest summer on record (335)
(Boston Channel) Amusing Parent busted after helping son's Boy Scout troop earn badges in porn watching, cigarette smoking, and beer chugging (45)
(AP) Obvious Mysterious noise haunts Wisconsin couple. No one notices the cans of missing refried beans (70)
(CBS News) Unlikely 17% of officers in the US military are black. 14% of Americans are black. Article says US military black officers are very rare (196)
(WTMJ) Followup Call off the HBO boxing analysts: Ex-fiancee/mother of groom courtroom catfight won't happen. Mom drops lawsuit after her son got dumped by bride-to-be (19)
(WGAL) Spiffy Chinese post signs around Beijing teaching citizens how not be rude bastards when Olympic tourists arrive (115)
(AP) Sad 117 sick, neglected cats, other animals found at Obama's home. What? Omaha home? Ooh. Never mind (70)
(LA Times) Asinine Dead man found in drivers seat of car that had received a parking ticket. No, not in England this time (33)
(Breitbart.com) Interesting Scientists recover complete dinosaur skeleton, a Tarbosaurus. Also find partial skeleton of a dinosaur that died by running with scissors, a Tardosaurus (92)
(TampaBays10.com) Florida Hulk Hogan "disgraced" that his wife is now dating a 19-year old boy, says his life is "total insanity." Not like he's asking for it or anything (157)
(Discovery) Misc Dinosaurs diversified over time. But even their portfolio wasn't enough to save them from the housing crash (34)
(Des Moines Register) Spiffy That Iowa Farker who asked for our help with his campaign slogans? Well, he's using them. Really (125)
(Some Guy) Strange 'Moore was part of a July 9 prank in which he dressed the headless roadkill in a blue graduation cap, white muscle tank top and shorts" (22)
(Time) Misc Barry Bonds turns 44* today. LGT "My, how he's grown" slide show (101)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida See the complete list of everyone injured at Disney's Magic Kingdom (102)
(Houston Chronicle) Strange Who is the biggest asshat? The couple with the Calvin peeing on Obama sticker on their truck or the woman who goes beserk and calls them racists? (246)
(Buffalo News) Followup Stretch of road to be named after Tim Russert; to curve to the left slightly before ending rather abruptly (45)
(Dallas News) Stupid 'Twat swap' details unveiled, owner compares club to church barbecue (77)
(AP) Sad Man uses an AK-47 to clear a traffic jam, a father, and two kids. Was an illegal immigrant protected by San Francisco's sanctuary laws. This did not and will continue to not end well (446)
(CNN) Asinine Is marriage just for white people? In related news, is CNN just for retarded people? (262)
(Metro) Spiffy Researchers in the field of drunkology hope to redesign streets to make them more drunk-friendly. In other news, people research drunkology. Professionally (36)
(Some Art) Photoshop Photoshop this beeswax cylinder (44)
(Lancashire Evening Post) Interesting More than one million New Yorkers struggle to speak English. Which begs the question: only one million? (80)
(MSNBC) Interesting Gun rights activists say that everyone ought to be able to carry a gun in a national park, presumably to prevent the scourge of pick-a-nic basket-jacking (155)
(BBC) Cool Stay in a beach resort in the UK for just £10 a night. The catch -- no toilets. The other catch -- the hotel is made out of sand (18)
(Media Matters) Followup Savage Weiner blames others now that he's on the hotseat for his remarks about autism (263)
(UPI) Stupid In a flash of brilliance, police think "hey what if we post the weird 911 calls we get on to YouTube, because that will discourage people from making weird 911 calls" Yeah (31)
(LA Times) Obvious As the media moves to correct itself for glowing coverage of Obama, it's entering a period of shallow analysis (186)
(Kotaku) Sad Grinch.... er... Nintendo president says he can't guarantee there will be enough Wii's available in the U.S. this Christmas. Then he jumped from a diving board into a warehouse full of money (256)
(Slate) Unlikely Yet, if the press craves consistency, it owes its readers some sort of assessment of Edwards (63)
(Daily Mail) Followup To the surprise of absolutely no one, the guy who sold his life on eBay will have to take it back because none of the top bidders can complete the deal. And he can't even leave negative feedback. Bummer (17)
(SFGate) Stupid Federal appeals court upholds rights of police officers to beat your ass for a bag of fajitas (56)
(TampaBays10.com) Florida Today's prostitute round-up brought to you by Clearwater (74)
(Bloomberg) Interesting The arctic could hold 90 billion barrels of oil. And, conveniently, will soon melt so that it will be easier to extract the oil (86)
(Now Magazine) Dumbass "X-Files" star David Duchovny claims to have seen a UFO. But he was "having a hard time then, you know, life" so he could just have easily been drunk (42)
(Stuff) Amusing New Zealand university offers $5,000 reward to anyone managing to arrest Condoleeza Rice in her upcoming visit to the country. What could possibly go wrong? (113)
(Daily Mail) Silly The government is urging parents to use steamy TV soap scenes to talk to their children about sex (19)
(NJ.com) Scary Assailant sought in gas station shooting. No word on whether the gunman appeared to hate cans (26)
(Daily Mail) Followup The Christian Bale "assault" on his mom and sister? He just yelled at them after his sister asked him for $200 grand to "help raise her children" and he turned her down. The heartless bastard (301)
(News.com.au) Hero Naaaaaahhh, what's up, Doc- HOLY FARKING SHIAT GET OUTTA THE HOUSE (79)
(Telegraph) Hero 78-year old woman has her purse snatched, outruns 20-year old crook, gives her a damn good shaking. Fark: her grandson is an Olympic sprinter. With "angry fist of Gran" photo (42)
(Cracked) Amusing If your last girlfriend had an IMDB page (54)
(BBC) Asinine News: To protect children from paedophiles, council stops elderly women photographing paddling pool. Fark: The pool was empty (68)
(Guardian.com) Followup Max Mosley wins his privacy case against the "News of the World". The paper is fined £60,000 and is to be spanked for being a very naughty tabloid (46)
(News.com.au) Amusing "It's one thing to cover your body with the flag, but quite another thing to be naked and using it as a horse's saddle" (38)
(Some Guy) Amusing Major search-and-rescue operation called off when the victims turned out to be two large inflatable penguins (16)
(9 News) Strange Man trapped under asphalt roller... Otto unavailable for comment (31)
(Telegraph) Amusing Newspaper misspells its own name on front page. It's not news, it's Furk (64)
(Daily Mail) Misc Sophisticated "Gastrosexuals" use food to woo women. Your girl wants steak (prepared with a crust of peppercorns and hazelnuts and garnished with frisee) (194)
(News4Jax) Florida Not news: Man steals 3 buses. Fark: He followed the routes and made all the stops (71)
(Flickr) Photoshop Photoshop this road block (84)
(Stars and Stripes) Interesting Congress opens hearings over military's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. Opponents and supporters of the policy vow to wrestle in oil while dressed in loincloths (147)
(Farktography) Farktography Theme of Farktography Contest No. 168: "Farktography Classic: Blue II". Difficulty: No sky. Details and rules in the first post. LGT next week's theme (310)

Wednesday, July 23, 2008
(CBS Sacramento) Asinine Cops: Auto theft? Check. Robberies? Check. Gangs? Um, that'll cost you extra (41)
(Some Jedi) Cool Remember the steampunk Star Wars figures? Here is the Empire Strikes Back edition. Cool tag beats Followup tag with a Force choke (148)
(Piedmont Triad / WFMY News 2) Obvious Drama teacher takes classroom role playing to a whole new level (164)
(Telegram) Weird Prison inmate introduces himself as Jesus Christ to see whether he can get along with cellmate. One ruptured spleen later, it appears doubtful (32)
(CNN) Obvious When homeowners lose their homes in forclosure, we laugh at them and call them stupid. When banks make high-risk investments on subprime debtors and lose, we issue $300,000,000,000 to bail them out (253)
(CNN) Followup Hurricane Dolly downgraded to "Led Zeppelin I" as levees hold (54)
(Yahoo) Amusing Cook County (IL) Commissioner Mike Quigley drafts resolution noting the 2009 Winter Classic between the Chicago Blackhawks and Detroit Red Wings. As for what the 10 letters that end the last 10 lines of the document spell, that was coincidence (81)
(Boston Globe) Followup Goodness Gracious (110)
(AZCentral) Unlikely Due to the fact that it is in such high demand, The New York Times has raised its newsstand price to $1.50 (148)
(Some Guy) Strange At least four people in West Virginia have been hospitalized this summer for drinking tiki torch fuel. And last year more than 190 residents got sick drinking the liquids inside glow lights (98)
(CBC) Silly News: Woman sues after service animal banned from city buses. Fark: It's a ferret (130)
(CNN) Dumbass House approves the taxpayer-funded Personal Responsibility Mortgage Bailout Bill of 2008 (479)
(Stuff) Hero Judge puts nine-year-old named "Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii" under court guardianship until a real name is chosen for her. Bonus childrens' names in article: Keenan Got Lucky, Cinderella Beauty Blossom, Sex Fruit (269)
(KABC-7) Sick Nine-year-old gets "Star Wars" ruined for him forever (387)
(Reason Magazine) Sad America's dumbest generation? (342)
(CBS Chicago) Spiffy Pennsylvanian with no arms and no legs finishes 275th of 308 in swimming portion of Pittsburgh triathlon. No, his name isn't Bob or Duncan, but he is a buoy (87)
(Some Guy) Photoshop Photoshop this doorway (56)
(Jalopnik) Amusing The 10 ugliest new cars in America (289)
(BBC) Amusing Chimp escapes zoo enclosure to get to the roof where it manages to disarm one worker before taking two tranquilizer darts and a banana (with great video) (35)
(USA Today) Asinine Ugly brat sues teacher over insulting remarks (104)
(Kansas City) Scary Old and busted: Drive-by shooting. New hotness: Drive-by grenading (40)
(I-Mockery) Cool I-Mockery travels to the top of Big Bear Mountain and discovers a genuine classic arcade that has stood the test of time since 1959 (61)
(Houston Chronicle) Amusing You know it's hot in Houston when inmates escape just to go swimming (26)
(SeattlePI) Interesting The #1 bear threat to America: Snuggle (86)
(AP) Silly "Spastic balls lure adults to Old School P.E. classes" (36)

Fark Forum


You are viewing a mobilized version of this site...
View original page here

Mobilized by Mowser Mowser