Adding a P.S. to my blog:

I think I discovered the "culprit" to my weight gain/plateau--wheat, or at least foods made with wheat flour. Also milk.

I wrote this blog a couple of weeks ago and since then have stopped eating bread, etc. and have lost three pounds and I'm feeling much, much better.

Also, I sat and talked with my pastor yesterday for an hour or so. He asked me something I'd never been asked: What charges you spiritually?

What an interesting question. He told me that for him it's listening to sermons.
I realized that for me it's reading/hearing/reciting the rich lyrics of deeply theological hymns and songs, many that deal with the blood of Jesus--"His blood has washed away my sin, Jesus thank you! The Father's wrath completely satisfied, Jesus thank you!"
OR
"What can wash away my sin? What can make me whole again? Nothing but the blood of Jesus."
To whom else would I go? Only Jesus has the words of eternal life!

thank you for your article....i'm going thru the same thing. I don't have any weight issues but I have "following Jesus" issues. Everything is well in my life and yet these feelings. I don't know why....I always come back but the nagging feeling of being "half n half"......but thank you for being honest. I'm glad there's other people who feel this way .....but the Lord is faithful to us .

"By perserverance the snail reached the ark." (Charles Spurgeon)
May favorite don't-give-up quote, ever!

Hi Nancy,

Thank you for this post. It's nice that you are so honest with your readers and it's also nice to know that I am not alone, that others go through this as well.

In an effort to stay focused I've created my own blog, Blessings from Above, to help not only others, but myself, focus on the positive things in our lives that God has given us. It helps to keep me track when I write it to remember not to "quit Jesus" because of all the wonderful things he has given us.

Check it out if you have time:
http://www.blessingsfromabove2.blogspot.com

I look forward to reading more of your thoughts and ideas on this blog now that I've found it.

Have a wonderful weekend.
Blessings!
Denise

Hi Nancy-I'm a LT(Lifetime) WW for almost 6 years. I haven't had any "weight" issues, and I've maintained for 6 years with God's help. I struggle on giving up on Jesus too, but there's a song from a young Gospel Artist that says "I have no other choice but to Trust You" and when I'm feeling low, I sing that and it makes me realize that Jesus is all I have, not my mother, my 2 daughters, not my pastor, not my friends, but Jesus. I thought I was alone in my "faithless" days, but its good to know others struggle, too. I love the Lord, He heard my cry and pity every groan, long as I live...I'll hasten to His throne..

Donna B.

Nancy, I'm a WW online lady since about March 07. Been into getting fit since Jan. 07 and lost almost 57 lbs last year on eating health and working out. Then the plateau hit and I had to ask myself some hard questions just as I had to do when I had been 245 lbs in a 3x. Now down in my 190's at a 12/14 and going down...I've faced with more tough questions and found out I'm in medical menopause from having a hysterectomy in 1997. I'm trusting in the LORD, have increased my workouts at Curves and walking and my hubby last weekend purchased a Treadmill for me which I love. Visit with me at www.daretobefit.wordpress.com and lets support each other.

I appreciate your honesty about your feelings concerning your weight and your faith. I think we all get to a place where we think it's "easiest" on the other side but we know the TRUTH and that's what sets us free and keeps us free. Amen!

Take care my friend.

This is a snow stormy day and I was so discouraged about my weight and had just given up as i need to lose 3times as much as you did....but I feel very much encouraged by your story and I'm ready to try again . I went to WW before but always gave up before my goal was reached; now I have much more to lose than I did back then,oh well can't cry over spilled milk huh! Thanks again for being a warm breeze on a cold day.

Nancy, What an amazing woman that can be that transparent and honest. How often we struggle on and on because our pride won't let us be honest with ourselves and with others. Remember that once we have brought something into the light, Satan has no more control over the situation. By bringing it out in the open God is free to work.

Secondly, I learned a new word recently. Qashar. Its the Hebrew word used to mark Jonathan and Davids friendship. Their friendship was described as knit together, like an afghan. Qashar means a friend that together you are stronger and can do a stronger work for God than if you continued alone. Ask God for a Qashar friendship if you don't have one already. She will help you stay on track and encourage you when the sales at Walmart no long have an appeal. (smile)

Weight Loss plateaus, man I understand, 30 pounds and its like my body saw a stop light and its still waiting for green for go. I was encouraged and helped by this discussion.

Blessings, Neva

I'm really struggling with church right now. I still do constant conversation with Him, reading daily, studying books about various aspects of my faith, but I just can't seem to drag myself out the door. I know it disappoints my husband, and true, I have been really ill with coughing/flu the last month, but I find no joy in going. There is no connection there for me. I am not in a women's group, Bible study, or anything else that helps me to join or become a part of someone elses life. I need to know I am contributing. I feel lost.

I can relate to feeling like giving up, especially when it comes to other friends who are not Christians who seem to have it all together all the time. But I have discovered that they haven't, and they have nowhere to go when problems strike. There is often no other answer than giving problems to God to sort out when our humanness can't! I know when I have drifted away, God has gently brought me back to Him, usually through one of those problems! Knowing He has the answers if we just leave things to Him, is a great relief!

I've struggled with weight loss and found out that I was hypothyroid and even had Hashimoto's Disease (an immune disease affecting the thyroid.) My doctor told me I couldn't lose weight no matter how hard I tried. Some days it is hard to stick to eating healthy knowing it won't help me lose - yet gaining is SOOO easy. I'm working hard iwht my doctor to get my thyroid stablized and it's taking a long time - but I keep reminding myself "baby steps" - I need to keep pushing forward and eventually I will get where I want to be - with God's help.

Hang in there- cool that you found out about the wheat. Common problem actually. You might get your thyroid checked though (ask for a Free T-3 test though too). Thyroid issues can rob you of energy and joy and even the will to do what needs to be done.

I can relate on both fronts with this blog. On the "quit-Jesus" issue, I think I am like you. Who else would I go to? But it is still not getting me "back with Jesus". I think I am just treading water right now. With both Jesus and weight loss. I figure that if I can just hang-in there, something will click somewhere, like you with bread. I don't know. At times it really does just seem too hard.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Nancy. I am having the exact same struggles. I have plateaued at not being able to budge the scales for 10 pounds forever, it seems. And lately, I have been struggling with serving Jesus the way that I think I should be. Reading your article has helped me. I will continue to serve the Lord, no matter how much of a struggle it is. I know that He is the only answer. And I pray that God will strengthen you in your walk with Him also.

So glad to see your thoughts! I have felt the same way, about quitting Jesus, more or less. I was worried about it until I read about the subject in CS Lewis' Screwtape Letters. He basically said fluctuation was normal, but that the devil would like to convince you that you're just "goin' down"! Lately I've been thinking that it's been due to my particular church not working out that well; the politics there have been getting in the way of pursuing God more directly. But definitely, like you, I come around to thinking that I'm stuck. I must've turned a corner at some point and can't go to anything but Jesus now.

I'm dealing with both issues. I felt as if you were writing this for me.
While I'm VERY involved in my church, I just feel like I need something knew. We just got a new Pastor, he adores my son, but I'm not a big fan of his. I don't want to leave my friends or make my son leave his firends (plus my boyfriend and his family go there, too), but I just need a new energy in my church life. I know that I just need to read more spiritual stuff and pray more. As far as the weight loss goes, I've been dealing with it for years. Maybe if I focus more on God, he'll help me with both issues. Thank you for letting me vent. Please keep me in your prayers.

Eighteen months ago yesterday, I developed a life-altering illness, seemingly rather suddenly. And while I've prayed and prayed for it to be removed, it hasn't been. It is, however, under control, and I am feeling better. But my life now is not the same, and may never be. This illness demanded major lifestyle changes from me, and on top of that, I lost my beloved grandmother right in the middle of it. God gave me the strength to deal with Gram's death, but the illness was still there. I became distant and angry and nearly "quit Jesus". And then, two months ago, another major crisis hit my family, the impact of which is completely out of our control. Like Peter, I quickly realized, "Lord, to whom shall I go?" While I still don't understand the why's behind my illness, I still needed God in this other crisis. And God has shown himself to be faithful. This latest incident completely brought me back. I still have doubts and questions, but the distance and anger are gone. I'm reminded of the old hymn "Where could I go but to the Lord?"....Thanks for being so honest in sharing your story.

Loving father, help those of us who are emotional eaters! Lord, help us to look to you to fill our voids instead of food, tv sitcoms, shopping, or whatever. Help us to let down our emotional guards and reach out to you and others for help. Teach us to be lights for the lost, realizing that, it's not all about us all the time.

what a great article... and yes, i think for myself, (after being a Christian for 43 years!) it is a constant challenge to stay full of Him... and key to all areas of my life. asking His mercy and help first of all... being in His word and having Him speak to me personally in and thru it... music is great also, especially when He gives me my own song for Him... and having others respond to the Lord.. thru my witness or that of others.. that i can know, see, and be a part of as well. i have no greater joy (spiritual charge!) than my brothers and sisters live in His truth.

check out also: www.settingcaptivesfree.com the Lord's table course. it is great for the weight issue and the faith issue.

praying for us all: Lord, we need You continually to revive our hearts in You... we surrender to You now... show us how to coopereate with You in this process today. thank You!

Weight loss is multifactorial. It encompasses the emotional, physiological and spiritual aspects of one's temple and life.

Adhering to a dietary scriptural protocol and a polysystemic overview of what may well be laying underneath the symptomotology of weight gain and the resulting ramifications are best addressed simultaneously by thorough investigation resulting in biochemical individual treatment protocols. We have sucessfully addressed many patients who suffer with chronic conditions of weight gain and obesity.

Thnk you for your wonderful article.

God bless you.

Dr. Trudy

Nancy I can appreciate your struggle. Thank you for giving a voice to my issue - I too have struggled with weight and found myself gaining weight - unable to lose it. After reading your article I know now that I can't quit - like you I've come too far, have tasted victory (35 pounds) and don't want to go back.

Nancy,
Thankyou so much for articulating what I have felt for some time after burnout caused me to have to resign as a pastor two years ago.
I never thought I could ever come to a place where as you say "I want to quit Jesus". And yet as I have kept going to my new church and kept availing myself of relationships that bump into me at the after service coffee time, I have encountered Jesus in that moment. As I have been unafraid to let the tears come during worship, I have encountered Jesus there.
So thanks again for giving me (& others) the words to express our perplextins and the hope to keep following the One who has the words of eternal life.

This came at such an interesting time- just yesterday, my husband and I (both believers) had the "Quitting Jesus" discussion. That being, "Why do we bother? God won't care. Everyone else is happy, has no worries ect." He has been very frustrated re our financial situation, and expressed being angry at God and wondering why he really was a Christian anyway. I myself have "Quit Jesus" one time when I was a fairly new believer and misunderstood what being a Christian really is. I cringe now when I remember calling up my best friend in tears , telling her that I can't be a Christian anymore because I can't wear my favorite black boots! Thanks for the realness that these blogs always contain!

Hi Nancy
On your first frustration I have something for you to try. How do you feel about natural health products? Have you ever done a detoxification cleanse? My sister is in the natural healing field and highly reccomends a product "Isagenix". She said one person she knows tried everything and counldn't loose the weight and after starting on of this companies cleanses he started loosing weight. I don't know much yet, but it sounds like when toxins come into your body the body tries to protect itself and builds a wall of fat around the toxin and that just sits in your body and can't be desolved because it is attached to the toxin. Maybe that is what you have left. Here is the website: http://isagenix.com/us/en/home.dhtml If you would rather use something you can touch first try your local health food store and talk to someone there.

On your second item. I understand, but am very fortunate to have a husband that always goes to church with me. One thing you might do is talk to him and tell him how important it is to you to have him share that part of your life with him. Also maybe finding a group/committee you can volunteer with or start you own. It helped me when I was falling away. One last thought I have realized. You may feel you are not making difference or people won't care if you don't go, but there are probably many little things that you have done or said to someone that helped them through something or made a difference that you won't ever realize. Everyone just remember God wouldn't allow more in your life than He knows you can handle.

God bless you.

This was great - thanks!

In our Christian-saturated lives, it is very rare that you hear anyone, especially someone in a leadership role, admit that they are struggling. We so often pretend that we have it all together - even to our close church friends. How much more full and vibrant would our lives be if we took off the mask? Thanks Nancy. I believe if more Christians were honest, the world wouldn't see us as so foreign and our lives as so unattainable.

Hi Nancy, and to all who posted comments. I would like to share that I can relate very much to the weight situation. As I have gotten older, it seems that weight just doesn't come off so easily. Although I am not at all near 200 pounds, I have found that my weight has increased instead of decreased even though I really don't eat that much. I know I need to work out - but don't have a gym I can afford at the moment. I do admit feeling discouraged and frustrated by this, but I am trying not to let this get me down. But all of your comments and suggestions have encouraged me not to give up, so I will keep pressing toward my goal. As for our Lord and Saviour, Jesus, I love Him very, very much. I agree 100% what one of you mentioned what the disciples said to Jesus, "Lord, to whom shall we go? For you have the words of eternal life" That is how I feel. Many times, I have felt down, but when I think about trying to trust or lean on in the arms of flesh, my heart always turns toward Jesus because I know He is the only One who really understands me totally and the only One who can help me get my life together. You have all encouraged me in one way or another through your comments. It is good to know that we don't go through our moments and changes alone, but that there are others who know and understand what it feels like. So by the grace of God, I will keep pressing forward, and my hearts desire and prayer is that I will meet each of you in Heaven when we all go to be with the Lord! May the Lord continue to bless and keep each of you and your families.

Nancy,

thank you so much for this article. I thought I was the only one that had these "quit Jesus" times in my life, it's so refreshing to know I am not alone. I also have weight problems, actually I've struggled with my weight since I was about 12yrd old, I am 41 now and am still struggling. I was doing WW about a year and half ago and doing well on it, I lost 25 pounds and then couldn't afford to go to meetings anymore and eventually stopped following the plan, well, needless to say I have gained all my weight back and then some and I just cannot seem to get myself motivated to get back on track. It just seems so much harder this time around.

Even though I go through valleys where I feel like "if you can't beat em', join em' I do know that I will never quit Jesus, because without Him I am nothing.

To all who have commented:
My heart is blessed to know that we are truly a fellowship of wounded, broken people who also know that there is nothing or no one greater than our God.
It's true what the apostle Paul wrote, that when I am weak, then I am strong.
I have been strengthened by all of you sharing your weaknesses!
Thank you.

Hi Nancy, Thanks for your honesty in expressing how you're feeling. Just wanted to encourage you on to say that usually when you are on the right track both in tackling weight or faith issues the evil one prowls around to knock your confidence in both areas. I'm hoping that by being aware this could be happening you will be able to pray to ask God to help you fight against the evil one and ask him to keep him back from you and strenghten you on the path that God is clearing for you. The path as always to victory. God Bless

I have gained 28kg in the last 11 years. It hasnt been an easy ride keeping the weight off. My work schedule's so busy. No time for work out as I used to do. Naturally I feel bad about it. As for quiting Jesus, its more like feeling guilty from not being the best I can be. I have been a christian since age 13. I feel like quitting him and think His heart often bleeds from my inadequacies and what I may call cold love. But then, who would love and cherish me with warts and all if not my Lord? So I stay put waiting for that time when my heart warms up again. I do love Him. No doubt. Thanks for letting me vent. Comforting to know am not the only one in this valley. Bless you all.

I can identify with both the weight frustrations and the relationship with God struggles. I was very involved in church and ministry through highschool and college, had such a special time of intimacy with God through these years, and I felt that although I was overweight-I could focus on Christ and He was all that I needed. I had time to focus on myself, to process life. Now, after being married and having a 2 1/2 year old and joining weight watchers I feel the stress of no time to deal with what's going on inside of me. Sometimes I wonder, do I really struggle with these things, or do I make things bigger than they are? Do I allow myself to sit in frustration by being to comfortable with the knowledge that yes, we are all in process in our lives with Christ? I absolutely love that I get to be married to my husband and I wouldn't trade having our son for anything-I just did not expect that I would have such struggles with not only my weight still since highschool, but such waves of depressive feelings after childbirth. This whole experience has left me feeling paralized a lot of the time, unable to really be determined and push through for the long term and reach out to Christ who I know deeply in my heart is still the Lover of my soul. It's like watching yourself as two people. The one inside who you really know as yourself and who you long to get back to, and the one who is going through the motions a lotof the time, stuck under this cloud of confusion that comes and goes. I wonder, will I ever feel what used to be normal for myself again? What to do with all of this. And after stumbling upon this article, I felt encouraged and taken out of my feeling down just a bit to know that everyone struggles, and although it seems so oppressive , Christ is never far from us. Why do I lose this Truth under all of my "dirty laundry" so often? Thanks for the transparency.

Hey Nancy,
Thanks for the wonderful blog and to everyone for the wonderful comments. I can relate to the weight and to the faith issues. I too have a hubby that I adore who is currently not walking with the Lord, and it is tough. As far as the weight, I have lost 90 lbs through weight journaling, walking, and just healthy eating. Calorie and fat gram counting seem to work for me as long as I write it down.
To Elizabeth. I understand that it is difficult when gyms are so important. Something I do alone and with a group of wonderful ladies at my church is Leslie Sansone. We started out with her 2 mile Walking the Walk - Getting fit with faith walk and are now up to her 4 and 5 mile DVD walk. $19 for a dvd is much better than an expensive gym membership and maybe your church would be a gracious as ours is in letting you meet there and walk with a bunch of friends. We have a devotional, prayer and good fellowship. It helps keep me motivated spiritually and health/weight wise. Good luck and don't let it get you down. The Lord will see y ou through. May the Lord bless you all!!!

Nancy,

I was feeling as frustrated as you were about weight. I had prayed many times during the past year about this issue. Two things happened that put me on a track that has been rewarding: First of all, in answer to my food and weight issues I heard God say one word--flour. I just knew in my spirit that flour was the main culprit. So I've been on a flour fast and for the most part a sugar fast. I do eat rice and potatoes. The first reward is that I've lost weight without being hungry. The second reward is in not having these foods, I've found that I don't get sleepy and groggy during the day.
Besides "choosing" to eat a minimal amount of flour and sugar, I also began to spend lots more time with God. As I've allowed myself to satitate myself spiritually, I've experienced a decrease in my appetite for food. There is strong evidence that our addictions are really nothing more than an appetite to experience more of God.

As far as going to church, I experience a lot of that. After a few years of first staying home and tuning into my favorite ministers (I used to like America at Worship on Sunday mornings. I don't think the programming is now available), then I began to "visit" different churches.
I never have found "just what I was looking for" yet I was ready to just be obedient and go every Sunday to a paritular church. After a year of attending worship services and having many converstations with God about my purpose and His plan for my life, I just again relented to His Words about TheBody of Christ. One can't avoid the lessons all through Scripture that reveal God's plan to work primiarily through His church. Now, I know that we individually make-up His church, however, I do believe that it's through a local community of believers that He wants us to serve Him first. Am I wrong? Anyway, I began going to a ladies SS class and it these ladies have blessed me through their friendship and shared journey, and I have had the privilege of being a blessing to them as well. I still struggle some w/ the rest of church though, and I know that their are a lot of other beleivers out there that share that frustration. And many of us are individuals who feed ourslef spiritually in many different ways rather than rely on the local body to do it for us.

Thanks for listening and here is my website: www.coachdoreen.com

When I read your blog about "quiting Jesus", I thought, "That's me!" Someone has the same issues as I do! It's not that I WANT to "quit jesus", but life gets in the way...college, chores, errands, husband, volunteering, family, friends and the list goes on and on and before I know it, I have not made time for Jesus in a month! I am terribly ashamed to admit that I did not even make time for Jesus on a daily basis during LENT! Our situation reminds me of Romans 7:15...
"15I do not understand what I do [go to Wal-Mart instead of worship]. For what I want to do I do not do [attend service on Sunday], but what I hate I do [dwadling]. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.
What a viscious cycle! Let's pray for each other.

Thank you so much for this article. Although I can and do relate on both topics. It is the spiritual battle and feelings that grieve me the most.

I have yet to learn exactly what brings me out of my "spiritual depression" but certainly reading these articles and knowing that there are other women who experience the same issues brings me a sort of comfort and increases my faith.